This week the illness seems to have subsided, and everyone in our household is seemingly healthy. However the
Anyway I know we all have a thousand demands on our time every day, and I am not the exception to the rule by any means. Just because I'm an employed mother doesn't indicate I work any harder than stay @ home mom's, or people sans children. We are all stretched entirely too thin.
But today was really hard on me. I was officing out of my home due to the laptop issue, so I could use my personal laptop. I don't know why but my mind kept wandering to the things I wanted, rather than what I have. Perhaps my mind kept drifting because I had no adult interaction, outside of NPR programming. I can't stand daytime TV, so there was no use turning it on. I couldn't keep my mind in one place, couldn't keep it still....it kept drifting to the things I need that I don't feel I get. I am NOT referring to material posessions here. I am talking about things like friends who check just to make sure I'm okay, or just to say a quick hello, I keep waiting for phone calls that tells me vengance is no longer sleeping and what I've been praying for is finally happening, just the things that validate the good deeds I have done and the good works and deeds I pass on and pray that the recipient is blessed by every single day.
Today I just felt like my being kind, loving, sharing what I can, forgiving when I would rather attack, being patient with the kids when I'd rather yell at them, "We've covered this a thousand times, you KNOW to pick up your laundry!" Just isn't getting me anywhere. I was frustrated with being nice, and wanted someone to be nice to me in return. I'm not ashamed to admit i was having a little pity poor Trin party. The running mental diatribe....nobody likes me, nobody has time for me, nobody appreciates me, blah blah blah. Luckily I kept to myself, buried my head in work and the kids, dogs & every other living thing that crossed my path came out unscathed.
Moon & Jake went to church tonight, as usual. While they were gone I stayed in my funk and worked on this 1000 piece puzzle I've been punishing myself with the last week. It has three colors. Red pieces, blue pieces, and golden pieces. Yeah, 1000 of them. I'm telling you, nobody punishes me as hard as I do.
Moon came in from GA's with a craft, as she always does. (Thanks to those Mrs. Pam & Mrs. Karen for their volunteering of their time!) Anyway, Moon has a fistful of popsicle sticks wrapped up in a rubber band. She calls me to the table and says, "Mom this is a puzzle. Time how fast I can put it together." She begins lying out the sticks and I see there's a bible verse written across them.
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people."
Everything you do affects someone, somewhere. You never know how far your good deeds, kind words, simple smile or a text to check up on an old friend will go. Same goes for negativity, so let's keep that to a minimum. I hope all of you never grow tired or frustrated of being kind, and don't waste your time on a pity party like myself. :)